St. Andrew’s Pictou, July 31, 2005

 

The 3AM Stranger

 

Genesis 32:22-32

Romans 9:1-5

Matthew 14:13-21

 

Maybe you have faced a family gathering and there are some relatives you have to encounter, but you absolutely and certainly don’t want to meet them.

 

This is exactly the place where our Biblical character, Jacob finds himself.

 

Jacob has been told that his twin brother Esau (who he has wronged in the past) is heading his way with 400 soldiers!

 

Like many modern day families there is a history of animosity and dysfunction between the twin brothers and it has to do with the same things that cause dissention in all families: inappropriate favourtism and the resulting pecking order.

 

Esau was born first of the twins and that means that he (as the oldest male) has first claim as the senior member of the clan. Jacob was born holding on to his brother’s heel, Jacob being the Hebrew word for “heel.”

 

The family dysfunction was hatched in an oracle where his mother, Rebekah was told that Jacob was to be the favoured son and so she favoured the husbandman Jacob who tended the flocks, while the father Isaac favoured the hunter Esau brought home game for dinner.

 

The dysfunction went on:

-Esau arrived home starving one day from the hunt and Jacob persuaded him to sell his birthright for a pot of lentils,

-Jacob also cheated his brother out of his inheritance by tricking the father Isaac into giving him the superior blessing and Esau had to settle for second best.

-Esau, angry at being disinherited, vowed to kill his brother.

-the mother protected Jacob from his brother by sending him to be with her brother far away in safety. (It was on this journey that he had the dream about the angels climbing the ladder, where he slept on the stone, naming the place Bethel, and God promised him possession of the country and divine protection.)

 

Our Biblical family was just like any modern family; an intriguing case study for Dr. Phil to straighten out or a dire project in waiting for “Super Nanny.”

 

But folks, this was a day before experts and people had to learn to solve their own problems!

 

Imagine that! We are going to look at the Word of God today telling us about how a family solved its own problems!

 

Jacob divides his forces into four separate groups and sends them on, knowing that they will meet Esau on the way and he will be impressed, meeting four different powerful contingents, one at a time, gradually and surely creating balance. (That was how it happened and Esau was suitably impressed.)

 

When he did meet his brother, Jacob treated Esau like a king and gave him gifts. With hospitality and skillful diplomatic maneuvering, Esau’s anger softened and he let his brother go in peace.

 

Our scripture today takes place before that struggle was resolved; before he met his brother and while he did not know how things were going to go. We meet Jacob during a time of high anxiety and fear!

 

Having sent his four sets of soldiers on, he put both of his wives and all of his possessions on the other side of a stream leading to the Jordan River called Jabbok and tried to rest for the big family event.

 

The scripture is clear that he was alone: alone with his fears and anxieties and alone in the middle of the night; totally alone and fearful.

 

Now a man appears and wrestles with Jacob all night. They seem to be evenly matched.

 

Some texts call this man an angel, some call him God and some just say that it is “a man.”

 

Even when Jacob asks him his name, he just says, “Why is it that you ask me my name?” So we are no further ahead.

 

When neither seemed to be wining this match the man hit Jacob’s hip and knocked it out of joint. It might seem unusual to us, but Jacob would not let the man go until he gave him a blessing. The man or angel renamed Jacob, “Israel,” meaning “You have struggled with God.”

 

Jacob named the place “Peniel” because as he said, “For I have seen God face to face and yet my life is preserved.” (Peniel means “The one who strives with God”or“God strives.”)

 

The scripture is clear that Jacob continued to limp form his midnight encounter; his 3AM struggle with the stranger.

 

This marvelous 3,000 year old story speaks to the common experience of all people in that we all struggle with that 3AM stranger that we individually meet and struggle with in our own particular way.

 

Each of us must face out 3AM stranger: whether the stranger be depression, violence, a missing spouse, self doubt, loneliness, lies, seemingly irresolvable dilemmas, sickness, or addictions.

 

My door rang at 3AM one night and I found a friend, not a stranger, but I was introduced to the stranger. The stranger was his dependence on crack cocaine. He needed $20.00 to get his keys out of his locked car; his common lie to get another hit. I never slept the rest of the night struggling with all of the possibilities of what might have happened when he didn’t return; even driving around trying to find him. All those who are addicts or who struggle to help them have met the 3AM stranger.

 

In the Matthew reading we find Jesus just after he hears that his friend John the Baptist has been beheaded; murdered.

 

Like Jacob, like you and I after we have confronted our 3AM stranger, we are weary and we want rest. He took a boat and tried to be alone but the crowds heard about it, and they followed him.

 

“When he went ashore, he saw a great crowd; and he had compassion for them and cured their sick.”

 

There is a common theme evident for Jacob, for Jesus and for you and I and it is that:

 the process of life is one of struggle.

 

All of us must struggle, as a woman giving birth, as a butterfly emerging from the cocoon, as men and women struggling with the process of life and growing up. We all must struggle at one point or another. We need to remind ourselves when we are struggling that it is a normal part of human existence: there are no exemptions.

 

But there is a choice about struggle. I am not talking about giving in to the struggle or killing ourselves fighting the struggle, I am going to give you another optional choice.

 

Consider the differences between Jacob and Jesus:

-Jacob was alone, Jesus found himself with others,

-Jacob wished to avoid those who wanted to see him Jesus embraced them, even refusing to send them away as the disciples suggested,

-Jacob wrestled with inner demons, while Jesus dealt with the outer demons of sickness,

-Jacob sought solitude, Jesus sought rest,

-Jacob wanted a blessing for himself; Jesus used the occasion to bless others,

-Jacob was interested in gathering together his possessions; Jesus gathered available resources for the common good: the loaves and fishes of world wide fame,

-Jacob sought to strengthen himself; Jesus sought to strengthen others,

-Jacob sought to heal himself; Jesus sought to heal the world.

 

I said that I was going to give you another option; actually Jesus gives us the other choice.

 

The solution to our human struggles with the 3AM stranger begins when we:  honour the struggle.

 

Struggles continue endlessly whenever we ignore, deny, or pretend that our struggles do not exist.

 

Our denials fuel our struggles; our denials will never solve them or make them go away!

 

By wrestling with Jacob all night, the angel broke through Jacob’s denial and sealed the breakthrough by dislocating his hip.

 

In the morning Jacob walked with a limp.

 

There is a saying that “you should never trust a man (or a woman) without a limp.”

 

The limp represents the honouring of human struggle.

 

Boys and girls do not limp, men and women limp because they have met and struggled with the 3AM stranger. They have honoured their human struggle and that is what makes them a man or a woman; a mature adult.

 

Consider how Biblically inappropriate it is for parents to shield their children from the reality of life’s struggles, leaving them unable and ill-equipped to deal with the struggles they will inevitably face.

 

A mature man or woman is one who has brought their 3AM stranger out of the middle of the night and into the light of day with loving support, and honesty. God’s power to heal can bring resolution and healing where there used to be only struggle.

 

The 3AM stranger loses the power to destroy when its’ identity is unmasked in the light and truth of day.

 

In the light of day, on that hillside with Jesus so many years ago, “…all ate and were filled; and they took up what was left over of the broken pieces, twelve baskets full.”

 

With the love and power of Jesus Christ, we have been sharing the twelve baskets of leftovers of those five loaves of the bread of life in churches all over the world, ever since.

 

AMEN                       Rev. Alan Stewart